Thanks! I Hate It. [demos]

by Gold Leader

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1.
A For Effort [demo] 04:04
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Gave into the American dream, watching my ambitions as they're washed downstream Not enough liquid courage to take me as I am, they call me the disappearing man Not enough air left in this box I've been living in Meaner than the Devil and uglier than sin Took a stand for something and it took me down Now I stand for nothing ever since you're not around You get an A for effort since you've both moved out of town Now I'm not there to bring you down I'm getting too old for this shit, feel like I've been here before Starting over from square one, I admit, but I don't believe in nothing anymore Tried to walk the straight and even, but I should have bet on odd Sold my soul to the Devil to make more money than God I swear to you I'd burn this place to the ground If it would kill all the mutant freaks I see running all around You get an A for effort for the way you drag me down I'll just stay in the background I wanna die for this, I want to stay up late I wanna talk to you all night, I want to go to bed at 8 I wanna play the rock star, I wanna disappear I wanna take the long way back, I want to stay right here This is good, this is nice, this is grand Finally got a plan but it's slipping through my hands Took a stand for something and it took me down You get an A for effort, but there's no one else around There's no need to make a sound 'Cause I'm not there to bring you down I'll just stay in the background
2.
Swan Song ['20 demo] 03:02
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It's just business, it's all who you know Good job selling out, it's a hell of a way to go Feeling desperate, feeling weak Looking different, losing sleep, 'cause I'm still Coming down from a five-year bender Don't you know I could have been a contender Making the world a bitter place Just admit it, this is what we are Get in line and do your part Say goodbye to the you that's gone away You can take them apart, you can tear them to shreds You can smash them to smithereens if you can get out of bed Maybe I was wasted, maybe it wasted me Got to loosen this tie 'cause there's-- There's no room to breathe, and it's all just All for nothing, who's gonna know? Was it all for passion? Was it all for show? All for nothing, who's gonna know? Was it all for passion? Was it all for show?
3.
Let Me In [demo] 03:21
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I found you among the shadows and the branches A rare and precious thing I tried to call out but I didn't hear an answer You were too far away It was the spring and my life was a patchwork of pieces Sewn and tattered memories I got the feeling yours was somehow the same And I took to you like a bird takes to its wings Let me in, let me in, let me in before my hands Let me in before my hands begin Let me in before you find that I'm hollow on the inside Let me in before my hands begin to shake We got married in the summer We set ourselves to fall It went right though we did the damn thing twice Maybe I'm not the marrying kind Let me in, let me in, let me in before my hands Let me in before my hands begin Let me in before you find that I'm hollow on the inside Let me in before my hands begin to shake Let me in before my hands begin to shake Let me in before my hands begin
4.
Time Flies ['20 demo] 03:07
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All the noise within my brain, it mingles with the outside strain Till I don't know which way to turn You always knew just what to say to clear the smoke and douse the flames When my insides would crack and burn Though so much time has passed, those feelings they said wouldn't last Well, they're still growing stronger every day If you'd come back you'd see it's not the way it used to be I've rid myself of my old Wicked Ways Time flies when you're having fun, at least that's how the saying goes So tell me why it's still rushing by, when I've never felt so low Moving on is best, I know, but I can't seem to let you go God knows how many times I've tried My friends, they ask if I'm all right, 'cause I stay in most every night They wonder what I'm trying to hide
5.
Molson Muscle ['20 demo] 04:51
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The phone's been ringing off the hook, people wondering where I've been "For the last few years, you've fallen off the map," yeah, I know, I'd gladly do it again I'd rather be up to my neck in work than up to my eyes in debt I don't have time for anything else, ever since I left Just forget about that high school reunion, things aren't exactly the same "Good to see you, you clean up so well" Yeah, sure, I know how this game is played I'd rather be up to my neck in work than head over heels in love I don't have time for anyone else now that I've become an adult What do you want me to say? What do you want to hear? I know we all thought things would turn out better One step further away from the glory days Meeting expectations to the letter I'd rather be up to my neck in work than up to my ears in doubt This isn't my scene, this isn't my town I've got to get out
6.
Giving Up [demo] 02:08
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I may not be the brightest knife in the shed But it ain't that hard to figure out what you meant By the way that you walked out or the look on your face Now I don't wanna hear what you have to say Heard it all before and if you meant it then By now you'd have changed, but you're still the same We've long been out of love, and I'm out of patience too I'm done making excuses for all the awful things we say and do I finally think it's time to throw in the towel Admit defeat, there's nothing anyone else Can do for us now, we're too far gone Don't want to make it sound like you're all to blame When you add it up, I'm as guilty as you But at least I'm ashamed of how it all went wrong
7.
Feeling Like I Do [demo] 04:25
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Come on baby, get me into the car Out on a bender and waiting for you, get me out of the bar I don't feel like staying, I just want something to do I just wanna sleep it off with you, pour me into you Come on baby, get up just to get down Out on a bender and waiting for you, count me out on the town I don't feel like staying, I just want something to do I just wanna sleep it off with you, pour me into you I don't want you feeling like I do, yeah yeah I just want you twisted with me too, yeah yeah I don't know what I've been trying to prove, yeah yeah Every time I get too fucked to move, yeah yeah
8.
I Won't Stay ['20 demo] 03:08
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Half sober, wasting the day away We lie together for warmth, it's not your company I lit that cigarette with the lighter he got you We both laugh, not knowing what else to do Can you hear me? Are things too far gone? Or was it like this all along? Two paths meeting in the night But only one of them leads back to the light I wrecked you, you wrecked me I wrecked you, I won't stay You held me close, I held you far away Telling drunk stories from your anniversary We both know what this is but won't speak its name And even if we did, it wouldn't be the same
9.
What's Left [demo] 03:48
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They say to seize the day, but that day's long gone The old guard is settling down, they say it's time to move on Now life's just like a movie, your favorite TV show Only it stopped being funny a long, long time ago Welcome to the first day of what's left of your life Stick your fingers in your ears It can wait just a few more years Just want to stay safe and soft and warm A beautiful house, a beautiful wife Gonna retire at sixty-five All you've got to do is take your eyes off the prize Cut off the head but the body still survives Grace without effort, success without pain Say goodbye to the golden years, just pray things stay the same Move on out, settle in, tell yourself it's for your health They didn't kill the dream, the dream killed itself
10.
Howard Hughes ['20 demo] 04:06
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Staying out, laying down, keep away, no relief Crawling back, can't stay around, call it a win, but it still feels like defeat Shake it off, shake it out, not making any sense, I've seen this all before Giving hell, taking none, missing out, can't take this anymore Missing memories, minus you, I've got no time to talk, there's too much work to do No more blackouts, no more time to protest, start from scratch again, can't settle for second best Got to stay away from me regardless of the cost, got to be on my own or I've got to be the boss No more high life, no more us, no more congratulations, no need to stay in touch Nothing left from the old days, we've ripped ourselves apart I've become a recluse, like Howard Hughes Watching movies in the dark Wonder what tomorrow brings Haven't heard a single thing God damn this jealous bleeding heart
11.
In It To Win It ['20 demo] 03:21
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Getting restless, going grey, aching bones won't hold my weight All the things I used to love just fill me up with rage Had it all, just for a second, they say tomorrow's a brand new day Now you're in it to win it when you've already lost your way Spinning down the drain and I'm seeing stars Trying to get back home tonight, but I just can't get that far What do you want to be when you give up? Take a good look, you're staying right where you are Looked away for just a moment, everything has turned around and changed Now you're kicking, and you're screaming all the way to the goddamned bank Spinning down the drain and I'm seeing stars Trying to get back home tonight, but I just can't get that far What do you want to be when you give up? Take a good look... Gold records, hung up on the wall Turns out it never meant anything at all It doesn't matter if you're out of the ring This job will break your heart unless you give up everything
12.
Southbound Train [demo] 04:59
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As autumn turns to winter and half the moon moves across the sky Every bar and cafe on this street all seem haunted now to me Just like every jukebox and every dance floor, and I bet you couldn't find A single hotel doorway that I haven't slept behind And though I can't rewrite the past or change the things I've done I might just catch the last train at the crossing if I run So pick me up, and take me down, southbound train, southbound train A hundred miles from here to Tucson might be far enough away Might be far enough away And it's happened once too often now, I never can recall their names Finding myself plastered on a bar stool between two of my old flames I pretend that I don't remember, and they pretend that they don't care And we stare straight ahead in silence and wish that we weren't there So pick me up, and take me down, southbound train, southbound train A hundred miles from here to Tucson might be far enough away Might be far enough away I've seen about as many familiar faces as I can stand to see today So pick me up, and take me down, southbound train, southbound train And when I get to Tucson and I find a place to stay I'll drop a line so you can tell me just how glad you are that I'm away

about

Demos with a bit more polish, recorded in the spring of 2020 with the hope of attracting a bassist and drummer

credits

released May 28, 2020

Writing credits & lyrics listed individually with each song

David M. Mallon - guitar and vocals on all tracks

Recorded & mixed by David M. Mallon at S-Town and Casa del Sammis

Cover design and photo by Uncanny Eye Illustration & Design

Special thanks: David Montanye, Jarrod E. Sammis, Mark Turley, Patrick Curtin, Jeff Watkins

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Gold Leader Hamilton, New York

David M. Mallon - lead vocals, guitar

David Montanye - lead guitar, backing vocals

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